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9 months ago · · 0 comments

The secret to achieving work life balance

Achieving Life Balance

One of the things experts who have changed their lives say, is that with dedication and perseverance – you can change your life. However, the hardest part about changing your life, is balancing all the aspects of your life that you wish to excel in. For instance, how do you manage to have a successful career when you have a strong desire to spend time with your partner and children?

boost self confidenceMany successful professionals often find themselves working long hours in order to move up the corporate ladder, or to build successful businesses. Getting the balance right can be difficult.

Whilst their are practical considerations and roadblocks to balancing life priorities (especially when you’re trying to make a change to reach a goal), there are two essential ingredients to achieving a good balance:
1) Unwavering self-belief
2) Feeling happy about the life balance that you maintain

 

1) Unwavering self-belief

This is one of the biggest challenges human beings face. Many people find themselves self-sabotaging their successes because they don’t really believe they’re good enough to achieve or sustain their desired goals. When the goal is set, it appears to be achievable, however, when roadblocks start to appear, or the road becomes a little more difficult, self-doubt creeps in to dent confidence and motivation. This self-doubt usually leads to procrastination. People often assume procrastination is laziness, however, it is usually the result of underlying fear.
One of the easiest ways to build self- belief when you’re moving towards a goal, is to continually refocus on where you want to go. For instance, if your goal is to write a book, you may find yourself procrastinating to avoid parts of the process (e.g. writing, editing, promoting) so as to have an excuse for it to potentially fail – as it’s not yet complete.

In the moments of procrastination, you must continuously remind yourself why your goal is important to you. You also need to be focused in the present moment, rather than focusing on the outcome of the goal. In the book writing example, you would focus on just the next step, rather than worrying about whether or not the book is going to be liked or well received. This mind shift takes some effort and persistence, because fear can be a very strong motivator for moving away from achieving a potentially scary goal.

2) Feeling happy about the life balance you maintain

Everyone has different desires and wishes for their professional life and personal life. Thus, you need to take time out to think about how much time you feel comfortable spending in all areas of your life and how this sits with those you care about most. Research shows that consistent, positive and quality time with loved ones is very effective at maintaining good quality relationships, so if you have minimal time with loved ones, at least make it count. This way, you can feel good about the time you’re spending together and rationalise the amount of time you spend at work, at the gym, with friends and acquaintances, travelling and so on.

It’s a good idea to give yourself space and time to reflect on the past year and to think about new strategies you could put into place to make your life more productive, effective and enjoyable. Trust in your self-belief and abilities to make the changes necessary to live a happy and successful life and seek help whenever you need it – to move forward with self confidence, trust and motivation.

Lizzie O’Halloran, BBSc, MASR, NLP Prac

Founder of Help For Mums

1 year ago · · 0 comments

How To Cope With Challenges in the Workplace

how to cope with work stressHow much do you value your work and how much validation do you seek from your job? One of the biggest traps you can fall into in your professional career is placing too much of your self worth on your performance and treatment within your office.

It was not that long ago that primarily men went to work – just to pay the bills in order to enjoy their ‘real’ life outside of the office. Over time, the demands of modern life have driven both men and women into very stressful and demanding roles which mentally can be very difficult to leave at work once retired for the day. Modern technology also allows work to encroach on your personal life – if need be (or you set a precedent to allow it to enter into your personal life).

As a result of the extended hours and pressures placed on you as a professional, it’s highly likely that you will draw a great deal of your self worth, confidence and drive from the validation you receive from work. However, herein lies the major problem. Everyone at work is feeling the same pressures and thus you have to just hope you have a good manager who has the time and energy to give you praise and recognition for a job well done.

It is for this reason that the best option is to separate yourself emotionally from work. It is also important to see it for its inherent value – as an exchange of goods, services and ideas (hopefully) for the betterment of society. Whilst it is a basic human need to feel self-actual used through the pursuit of excellence, in order to maintain a high self-esteem it is much more beneficial for you to seek your validation internally first and then from the people you love and trust most.

Yes it is important to feel valued and respected at work, however widen your net. By all means validation from your colleagues and from people you respect, however do not judge your self worth against these potential validations. The sad fact about many modern day offices is that it is often not until an individual leaves that senior executives really learn how valuable they were to their organization. Thus, a paucity of praise is more likely to reflect an office culture than it is to be an indication of your intelligence or ability.

Put work into perspective and regularly internally praise yourself for all the jobs you do brilliantly on a daily basis. After all, that little internal critic can at times be the harshest of all.

To find more professional inspiration or support visit: http://www.helpformums.com/therapies/life-coaching/

2 years ago · · 0 comments

Improving Self esteem tips: How to know it’s time for a break

life-coach-professionals-student

life coaching for professionals and student

Why it’s important to take a break for your self confidence and self esteem

I am a very driven person. It’s something I learnt from my mother who has an amazing ability to decide she wants something and then go for it. My internal drive pushes me through when I feel like I have nothing left to give. However, the down side is it can be difficult to know when to stop, when to take a break, or when to shift focus.

Over the years I have learnt various ways to identify there is a need to stop and also now ensure I schedule a week off once a year to rest and recuperate.

One of the things that happens as a result of burn out is poor decision making. The consequence of pore decision making is usually negative feedback. When you think of self esteem and self confidence a great deal is based on your perceptions on yourself and these are based on internal and external validation.

When you feeling burnt out you begin to increase self criticism, have a tendency to judge yourself too harshly and can assume you are being judged negatively by others also. As a result your internal validation is very low and you perceive your external validation to be low also. Both of these things are a recipe for poor Self esteem.

So how do you know it’s time to take a break?

One of the most obvious signs is when you feel like you are pushing against the flow rather than travelling along the flow. In other words things feel like a real struggle. This often happens when you’re feeling burnt out in business. Your ideas don’t flow as easily, you feel like you’re pushing people to buy your products and you’re no longer truly enjoying the process.

When you feel you are working too hard and not enjoying the flow or seeing any real progress, it’s time to take a break. It’s not time to quit. This is not the time to give up, but rather to give yourself headspace to come up with more innovative ideas to grown and succeed in your endeavours.

So protect and manage your self esteem and self confidence regularly and take a break whenever you start to feel the signs of potential burn out.

For assistance to improve your self esteem and gain self confidence visit www.helpformums.com